I’m not perfect…

I'm not perfect, but I am beautiful (a great post on not being perfect) from Glorious Treats

I’m not perfect.

Oh, in some ways that statement really pains me to say.

I’m a perfectionist… it’s how I’m wired.  I like things, life, and myself to be clean, organized, pretty, and perfect.

In some ways this blog has helped me control, or at least channel my perfectionism.  My house is not always in order… ok, let’s be honest, it’s actually rarely in order!  My life does not always go as planned, I say things I wish I didn’t say, and I don’t look exactly the way I wish I did.

This blog is the one place I get to have things just the way I want.  I get to post pretty, edited photos that expose only a couple square feet of my house (and not the mess required to create the “pretty” thing).  I get to sit at my computer and write nice little captions about pretty cupcakes and cookies… all the while sitting at my messy desk, un-showered and in my pajamas.  I get to have one little place in my life, even if it’s a virtual place, that is perfect.

This next week I’ll be attending a big blogging conference in Texas.  This is where my real life and my virtual life collide.  It’s terrifying.  Really, deeply, terrifying!

Next week I’ll be face to face with many people I have only “met” online.  People who only know me for my Hydrangea Cupcakes or Pink Ombre Cake, or decorated cookies.   Things that are pretty, staged, and as perfect as I can possibly create.

The problem is… I’m not much like any of those things.

I mean, I do feel like my site is a reflection of me in many ways… I do love pretty things, I love details, I love making things by hand.  But this site is only a part of me, not the full picture.

I am not perfect.

I am overweight.  I’m 35 and still have acne.  I don’t know what to do with makeup, and rarely wear any.  I don’t know what to do with my hair either… so it’s just there.  Sometimes I talk too loud and say things before I think.  I don’t own anything by Coach or Kate Spade, mostly because I can’t afford them.  My house is 1450 square feet and has one bathroom… it’s the house we can afford, and I am rarely proud of it.

This week I was talking to my dad about my upcoming trip and told him that I was really intimidated by the (people at the) conference.

He asked why.  I said… “Well, my site is so pretty and perfect, and I’m not.”

He said, “You mean you’re afraid people will find out you’re not perfect?”

“Well… yes.”  I replied.

He said, “Let me tell you something… all of the other people going to the conference are imperfect too.”

It was so simple, yet somehow it really hit me.

It’s true.  Somehow I’ve forgotten that.  All of the ladies wearing their colored skinny jeans and chevron print, and statement necklaces… looking like they just stepped out of Pinterest, they’re not perfect.

Now there is a lot to be said for taking good care of yourself, it’s important.  I’m not suggesting we all stop showering and go everywhere in our pajamas.

But if a grown woman (me) with a quite successful blog, many good friends, a supportive and loving family and enough disposable income to fly from California to Texas for a blogging conference, is scared out of her wits to meet a few women… then something is a little off.  I’ve been lying to myself and it needs to stop.  I’ve bought into the idea that I need to be perfect to be beautiful, and that’s bologna.  I’ve told myself that everyone else is more beautiful/successful/confident/cool/fashionable than me, and it’s simply not true.

Sure, we all have different strengths… some women do a beautiful job with their hair and make-up, others are great speakers, some are especially talented photographers, some have great presence in a crowd…

But you know what… I’m pretty awesome just as I am.  I’m smart, hardworking, creative, talented, dependable, honest, kind, funny, and beautiful in my own way.

I’m not perfect, but I am beautiful!

So if you run into me next week (or anytime in the future) try to hide your surprise when you see I’m not perfect…and try to hide your shock that I’m nearly 6′ tall.

I wont be wearing skinny jeans… because I can’t.  I won’t be carrying a designer bag.

But I do truly enjoy meeting new people, and sharing a bit of our lives.  I love meeting people who are smart, funny, creative, and nice.

And hey, if you happen to look great in mint colored skinny jeans, and have a super pretty bag… awesome, go for it.  Rock ’em.

I’m not entirely sure why I felt the need to write this post today.

I guess I’m hoping that my moment of enlightenment will be an encouragement to many of you who may feel the same.  And if by some small chance you were ever intimidated to meet me… please don’t be, I’m not perfect and I’m secretly very glad that you’re not either!

I’d love to hear from you…. what are the qualities that make you beautiful and special?

147 comments

  1. Bravo, thank you for writing such an awesome, truthful entry about self esteem. I think lots of us struggle with these insecurities, I know I do. I never think that what I do either in my baking business or interior design business is quite good enough. Like you, I do not have the perfect home or kitchen, and am usually flying by the seat of my pants most of the time. Be proud of your wonderful blog and amazing treats. Have a good visit to Texas, are you in the Houston, Dallas area or somewhere else. I have called Frisco(suburb of Dallas) home now for many years.
    Again thanks for sharing.

  2. Dear Glory To make a long story short: Thank you for honesty and courage to write this. If everybody would let their masks fall the world would be a better place. Thank you again.

  3. Glory: I admire you opening up in this posting. It’s hard for all of us but don’t compare yourself to others. Be happy with who you are and enjoy what you have in family, husband, children, etc. Some people who look perfect to you may have their own insecurities or other struggles in life which are not visible. I’ve got 20 years on you and you will look back and laugh at this. I’ve been reading your blog for two years and you’ve brought me joy and inspiration as you have so many other readers. Enjoy the conference and hold your head up high. You are beautiful!

  4. Hello Glory,

    Today I was looking for a Cupcake Recipe on the internet, and for my surprise I found your blog.

    I am shocked with my mouth wide open with all the talent you have and share in this blog!

    I was reading your post for today, and as I started reading I thought to myself ” c’mon give yourself some credit, your soo talented” and when I was getting to the end I was glad to see that you really feel beautiful and that you have family and friends that love you. And if that’s the case nothing else matters. BUT if you have talent in these type of things, who says you can’t be a makeup artist or a fashionista?

    Good luck with your conference and try to look as pretty as you can!

    :)

    Regards,
    Natalia from Mexico.

  5. You know what?!

    I’m not so secretly happy you’re not perfect either. I’ve felt exactly like this more times I care to admit.

    You are right. You are beautiful. Does not matter how you look. We can see your inside from your work and it is great! So talented!

    Thanks for sharing with us!

  6. Such a phenomenal, inspirational post!

  7. I love you Glory. You mean so much to me. This post was beautiful. =)

  8. I wish I could write better in english… Your text touched me so much. Because your blog is so perfect, I couldn’t start mine for 1 month after its creation. I tough I wasn’t good enough (mean, I wasn’t as good as you). To read your text made my cry. You are an inspiration to me (for me?). Forgive my bad (imperfect!) english!
    Julie (from Québec)

  9. Wow, thanks for the refreshingly honest transparency. You have any amazing blog that you can be so proud of, but even this doesn’t define who you are! You are a precious women, given an amazing gift and I just want to thank you for sharing it with all of us. Thank you for the beautiful post:) (Calgary, AB)

  10. What an absolute breath of fresh air! You have put me in a much better frame of mind to start my day – thank you!

  11. This is a beautiful post… Thank you for sharing! Amazon insight and I think every person who reads this will think again about themselves and how we all are too hard on ourselves. You are amazing!

  12. Thank you so so much for sharing, writing such an inspiring blog post. I always thought I’m not good enough in baking/ cake decorating and things always end up not as planned, picking flaws in my cakes instead looking at them as whole. I always admire people that maintains a perfect blog like you do and the confidence in baking but it turns out that everyone of us is insecure and imperfect in some ways but that doesn’t mean that we’re incapable =) Thanks again for the beautiful post. I don’t get to see you in person but i truly believe that you are beautiful inside out!

  13. Heck, if you were perfect, I wouldn’t want to meet you anyways 😉 I love that you wrote this… because it’s what I always feel like when I have to present myself in a new environment. That first blogging conference I went to was HARD. The expectations are there when you’ve gotten to know someone virtually, and it’s hard to live up to what those expectations might be. I know that you are amazing already, and I absolutely cannot wait to give you a big hug!

  14. Glory,

    I really LOVED this post – maybe because it touched a chord in me. I have been reading your blog and trying your recipes for a few years now. I think you have incredible talent and am so happy that you share it with all of us. I have always loved to cook/bake but because of women like you sharing and giving advise it allowed me to take my baking to a whole new level. Writing a post like this one took a lot of courage and just makes you even more personable and beautiful to me. Thanks for all that you do and for keeping it real.

  15. “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” ~ Dr. Seuss. Just show up and be you … it will be okay!
    Love your blog and you inspired me (a non-baker) to make your hydrangea cupcakes with my granddaughter. They turned out beautiful; thanks for the inspiration!

  16. Thank you. I really needed that post today! I hope you enjoy your trip. From reading the other comments of people who have met and know you…you are bequtiful!

  17. This post is exactly why I think you are BEAUTIFUL! When I went to Kentucky, I sat near you at breakfast and I was struck by how REAL you were! I loved everything about you. You were easy to talk to and laugh with. You were approachable!
    As women, I think MANY of us struggle with trying to be perfect and keep up with others. It’s so refreshing to meet others like me–IMPERFECT!

    Keep being you, you are awesome!
    Jackie Lee

  18. You have summed up so perfectly in this post the reason why I have loved your blog since I first discovered it–everything you create is absolutely beautiful, which is a reflection of YOU, and more importantly the one who created you, and your “realness” comes through as well, as in your honesty about how you feel about your upcoming conference. Thank you!!

  19. I just found your post as a guest blogger on one of my favorite blogs, TidyMom! I can wait to start reading your blog. This touched my heart and made me think and touched my heart. Heck, I had tears running down my face. Let’s have coffee!!!! Safe travels and God Bless You!

  20. You are blessed to have such a wise man for your father. I hope his words gave you new perspective and comfort. I’m sure he’s very proud of you.

  21. Oh my goodness! Your creations are SOOOO perfect and you are VERY intimidating!! I am a party stylist and often plan on a budget and make sweet treats myself. I’m decent but no where close to your status!! Your creations give me so much inspiration and I’m afraid I would be very intimated to meet you in real life – especially due to your baking and blog success! I am in the same boat in a lot of the ways you mentioned but I do own mint skinny jeans. 😉 Thanks for sharing your heart! :)

  22. Glory – Thank you for such a refreshingly honest post. You are amazing! As is everything you do. I hope someday to have the pleasure of meeting you in person myself!

  23. Can’t wait to finally meet you Glory!!……….oh and FYI, I TOTALLY get how you’re feeling!! I stress out that I haven’t lost weight that I wanted too, and don’t look good enough in any of the clothes I bought. Didn’t have time to get my hair color touched up or trimmed because of our move…….but, it is what it is….or I AM what I AM! 😉 all will be fine once we are there!!

    See you soon!

  24. Rock on Girlfriend!!

  25. Glory, you just made my day. I love your blog WAY MORE than I already did (if that’s possible0 because now I know you’re a little less like an ‘I could never be like that’ goddess and a little bit MORE of a ‘some of the things I do are nearly as good as Glory’s’.

    It can be hard for me to get over the lack of perfectionism in my life. I veer crazily between ‘I’m doing too mch, I can’t keep this up, this is crazy’ and ‘I HAVE to do more. I HAVE to be more. I HAVE to achieve more’.

    I feel more beautiful today than I did yesterday because now I realize I am not 100 miles away from being like someone I admire and think is beautiful and talented and awesome. ANd I really needed that today. Thank you! :)

  26. Thank you so much for speaking from your heart about what we all think and feel at one time or another. I LOVE reading your blog and appreciate the time and effort you put in to making it “perfect”!
    Thanks!
    Angie

  27. Glory, The first time I met you I immediately liked you because of your sweet countenance and genuine honesty. I was inspired by the amount of effort and creativity you put into the girls’ class. Since then I’ve continued to love hanging out and enjoy the free flow of ideas as we talk about anything and everything. God made you who you are and He is perfect. :)

  28. This is a great post. Blogging/social media has created a strange phenomena among (mostly) women- that we are as perfect as the snippets of life and angles we choose to share. And we stress ourselves out trying to live up to these snippets or live in fear that someone will declare us a fraud.

    You’re pretty awesome. :)

  29. I met you last year at Cookie Spring Fling. I think you are truly amazing. I do love your blog, but you should know I was so excited to meet you. I think you are beautiful and I love that you don’t feel the need to dress up and put on a ‘face’ to meet other creative amazing women. You Rock being you! I love that about you!

    Blessings on your life and your family!
    Marla

  30. Doesn’t it make life easier now that you’ve “learned” the secret from your Dad? – that no one is perfect. Oh, yes, there are a few who might think they are but 99% of us know that isn’t true. It is PERFECT that you realize all your special qualities and know that you are awesome. We love what you choose to share and please know that we value you as a very talented, special person, too. You rock.

  31. Beautifully written! Thank you for sharing this. You are amazing by the way, your blog is such an inspiration.

    Mandy,
    all the way from Indonesia :)

  32. Thank you for your beautiful post. It was exactly what I needed to read.

    I find it so easy to get down on myself for not measuring up to some elusive standard. Rationally, I know that I am intelligent, talented, and hard working. I know that I am a beloved teacher and that I touch the lives of those around me. And yet… I see those who are beautiful, slender, socially at-ease, and I feel worthless in comparison. Reading your post helped me regain perspective.

    Thank you,
    Amie

  33. Thank you so much for this post Glory. I am a shy, awkward, still occasionally pimply, and now getting grey and wrinkly 41 year old who has just started blogging this year. I have always struggled with other peoples perceptions of me. Thank you for reminding me of what is important in life. This has lifted me up after a couple of low days. Thank you!

  34. Glory — what a beautiful name and what a beautiful post. Your website and your creations are stunning and your open soul is just as radiant. Being a woman of a certain age, I am so joyful for younger people when they discover that people of substance value others for their contributions, not their trappings or looks. Thank you for sharing your incredible creations with us, and for teaching us how to build our own edible art. You’re magnificent through and through, so revel in it. :-). All the best to you.

  35. I was searching for Sugar cookie ideas for my sons christening, Fantastic site btw, and came across your “I’m not perfect…” post. Thank you for writing this. You have just made my day that little bit better and brighter.

    ♥♥♥ from a fellow creative perfectionist

  36. Check out Brene Brown, http://www.brenebrown.com/about/, she is a therapist based out of TX who writes about vulnerability and ‘daring greatly’.

    Beautiful post, I think we all can relate, or at least all of us who can embrace our vulnerability :)

  37. Thank you for sharing this:) As a first time mom at 38, I sometimes catch our reflection in a mirror and I am shocked at the unkempt woman with the perfectly dressed baby girl. It was nice to be reminded that we are all beautiful, grey hairs and all.

  38. Glory! I love you! What a beautifully written post and 120% true. When I first met you, you know what I honestly thought? That you were gorgeous. Yes… I did notice you were tall 😀 sorry! But I first noticed how stunning you are. And the other thing I noticed, (even through my self-conscious “new girl” fear) was you made me feel at ease the second you hugged me and I felt like I’d known you forever. You rock, please don’t ever doubt that and stand tall! You are amazing <3

  39. Glory, I read this post the day you put it up and then got sidetracked. Going through my millions of window tabs tonight to clean up my computer and found it again. Lo and behold you have 140 comments, which says a lot for how you have touched people! I have only a few baking bloggers that I follow regularly because I know I can trust their recipes, that they’ll turn out tasting great and also that their directions and photos are uber helpful. You are a very talented woman and like you, I am not perfect. Last year I was signed up to go to a food blogging conference and then backed (chickened) out at the last minute. Confidence is a tricky thing but each time we step up and try something new or go out and meet new people we are squashing our fear and living life more fully. The other night I went to a cake decorating class, something I’ve been wanting to do for a few years but never got around to. I was glad I pushed myself and plan to go to the next one. Keep blogging and being imperfect because in the eyes of so many of us readers, you are terrific!

  40. I found your site and this post by chance today. I feel extremely lucky to have come across it and you! I think you are wonderful. You share information and give of yourself knowing others may copy or share what you have done. You are a rare gem among a group who always show you what they can do but never truly tell how its done or how they felt while doing it. Thank you for the cry, sometimes it helps knowing I’m not the only imperfect perfectionist in the world. :)

  41. It’s really important for me that you wrote this topic. Only this morning I’ve been thinking that I just can’t overcome myself and start doing something in what I feel I can’t be perfect. Even thinking about that makes me feel owful. But if even you feel like that sometimes I think I can deal with it.
    Your blog is amazing, this is the one of the most beautiful place on the Internet. And you know what? I don’t care how you look, because what you do is so fabulous that it makes you glow in some way that can’t be prettier.
    Thank you, you are my cupcake guru :)

  42. I have loved every gorgeous party, treat, cookie, cake you have posted, but this is by far my favorite post…ever. I was too afraid to even attend the conference this year, even though I really wanted to go, but I feel VERY uncomfortable meeting new people,and always feel that I don’t even come close to measuring up.
    Thank you for writing this.

  43. I am new to your website, and your transparency is so refreshing! I love your creativity in the foods that you design….a God -given gift! I am looking forward to watching for your new posts….feel free to reveal yourself to your audience….we love it!! Blessings to you!

  44. Pingback: You Are More Beautiful Than You Know | Maria Shriver

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